I awoke to winter whiteness. = (
Chester and I headed down to the bog. It was bright not only from the snow that was PILED on the ground, and decorating the trees, but I also woke up very late for me. Down at the bog the "lady" cattails had snow piled up on the top of their stalks, looking much like the Royals at yesterday's wedding.
Chester decided that we needed to explore the middle of the bog. It was cold enough I figured I wouldn't get my feet wet or sink in the mud, so down the middle we went. One should never mock the females of the cattail line. For one, they tower over me, and since the wedding was over they suddenly felt the need to shed themselves of their lovely white chapeau's.
By the time I got out of the bog I looked like I'd been in a major snow storm.
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Friday, April 29, 2011
True Confessions
I'm just putting it out there now.
I cheated.
My husband is aware, and in fact was with me when it happened.
Yep. I ate cooked spinach.
I started a new diet. It is a Doctor supervised kind of thing. My attempts at Weight Watchers was an epic fail. AGAIN. I know where I go wrong with them, I've tried them twice. There is something with me and beating a dead horse or something, I never seem to learn after the FIRST time. I KNOW if I eat bread what it will do to me, but hey WW says I need to eat it and I willingly fall into the trap.
My husband smiles and says, "The body weighs what it wants to weigh."
I love you. NO. My body is going to weigh what I want it to weigh, damn it!!!
There is actually some truth to what Doug says, something about set point and when you've been at a certain weight for a while the body likes it and will fight to keep it. You can reset it, you just have to commit to getting the weight off and keeping it off. In time the body will reset.
I guess normal people go on a 'detox' phase of the diet for three days. Gets them past sugar cravings etc and they are then on to the actual diet. However, I have proven once again, that I am not normal.
The Doctor looked at me and said, "You are packing a lot more water than people normally do. If you can do it I want you to stay on the detox diet for two weeks."
At the time it was like, "Sure Doc, meat and raw green veggies. This is not tough for me." I LOVE veggies and I love meat. However, I have to tell you that there are only so many GREEN veggies out there (peas are excluded) and while I love meat, you can only eat so much chicken. It has been a bit of a struggle. Worth it as I've already lost 8 pounds, but a struggle none the less.
Last night Doug and I went out to dinner. Carefully plotting where I could eat we decided on Golden Coral. They have a salad bar and meat. What joy is mine. ;)))
I started with a nice salad and while they didn't have olive oil and vinegar they did have a fat free Italian and that's acceptable. Then I went back for the meat. Found chicken and some sort of beastie that was unbreaded but I wanted something besides meat on my plate and there was no way in hell it was going to be salad.
That's when I saw it. Spinach... it tempted me with it's dark green goodness, beckoning unto me to just try a little, just a little bit, I won't tell if you don't. On the plate it went. I got back to the table smiled at my husband and said, "You don't see this." He dutifully replied, "See what?"
And that's when I cheated.
I cheated.
My husband is aware, and in fact was with me when it happened.
Yep. I ate cooked spinach.
I started a new diet. It is a Doctor supervised kind of thing. My attempts at Weight Watchers was an epic fail. AGAIN. I know where I go wrong with them, I've tried them twice. There is something with me and beating a dead horse or something, I never seem to learn after the FIRST time. I KNOW if I eat bread what it will do to me, but hey WW says I need to eat it and I willingly fall into the trap.
My husband smiles and says, "The body weighs what it wants to weigh."
I love you. NO. My body is going to weigh what I want it to weigh, damn it!!!
There is actually some truth to what Doug says, something about set point and when you've been at a certain weight for a while the body likes it and will fight to keep it. You can reset it, you just have to commit to getting the weight off and keeping it off. In time the body will reset.
I guess normal people go on a 'detox' phase of the diet for three days. Gets them past sugar cravings etc and they are then on to the actual diet. However, I have proven once again, that I am not normal.
The Doctor looked at me and said, "You are packing a lot more water than people normally do. If you can do it I want you to stay on the detox diet for two weeks."
At the time it was like, "Sure Doc, meat and raw green veggies. This is not tough for me." I LOVE veggies and I love meat. However, I have to tell you that there are only so many GREEN veggies out there (peas are excluded) and while I love meat, you can only eat so much chicken. It has been a bit of a struggle. Worth it as I've already lost 8 pounds, but a struggle none the less.
Last night Doug and I went out to dinner. Carefully plotting where I could eat we decided on Golden Coral. They have a salad bar and meat. What joy is mine. ;)))
I started with a nice salad and while they didn't have olive oil and vinegar they did have a fat free Italian and that's acceptable. Then I went back for the meat. Found chicken and some sort of beastie that was unbreaded but I wanted something besides meat on my plate and there was no way in hell it was going to be salad.
That's when I saw it. Spinach... it tempted me with it's dark green goodness, beckoning unto me to just try a little, just a little bit, I won't tell if you don't. On the plate it went. I got back to the table smiled at my husband and said, "You don't see this." He dutifully replied, "See what?"
And that's when I cheated.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Copy Cat
One of the blogs I follow showed a gal in a T-shirt with a clever saying that exemplified the community. I went in search of T-shirts that express my personality and these are the three best.
I wish I could say that I've never said this line or something similar, but alas...
Ah, the arachnid community. We still have a truce. Right?
And this for my adorable brainiac husband.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
G-Kids go skiing with Habojee
This is Eve and James. Habojee (Grandpa) took them skiing yesterday.
They were fortunate that Doug (Habojee) had a student teacher that was a ski instructor in another life, she even specialized in teaching kids how to ski.
I'm not fond of the white stuff myself, but hey if you live in Utah might as well get some enjoyment from it. I can think of nothing better than watching footage of other people freezing their behinds off while I'm nice and warm. Yep, enjoyment at its finest.
***
Then he took Laine and Eve the next day so they could try some harder runs.
Um, Eve had a helmet, but wasn't she awfully close to that pole?
Had I been shooting that footage the expletives would have made it unfit for airing.
It would be great to be fearless.
And now I'll bore you no further with my home movies.
= )
Monday, April 18, 2011
Yellow Cat Lady
About a week and a half ago I mentioned hearing my neighbor lady sobbing because her cat had died. I thought the cat was unique because it always walked with the dogs.
I now think it is my neighbor who is unique. She apparently got another cat, tan coat with a ring tail. Part Siamese maybe? Whatever. That cat is now walking with the dogs. You can tell she's training it as it didn't follow as faithfully as Yellow Cat did, but Ring Tail wasn't doing too bad.
Sorry for the lack of posts I was major sick last week and the only thing I thought about was bed and how to crawl under the covers and stay there.
I now think it is my neighbor who is unique. She apparently got another cat, tan coat with a ring tail. Part Siamese maybe? Whatever. That cat is now walking with the dogs. You can tell she's training it as it didn't follow as faithfully as Yellow Cat did, but Ring Tail wasn't doing too bad.
Sorry for the lack of posts I was major sick last week and the only thing I thought about was bed and how to crawl under the covers and stay there.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Things that excite me...
I have a deck of cards that are sort of a writer's prompt kind of thing....
I drew "Things that Excite me"
This does.
My oldest boy, a hundred years ago, needed his daddy and I let him go. I won't even begin to try and defend what an "actual' mother would have done. I have done my time in "mother's hell" and I'd make the same decision. I could not give my child what he needed and social mores be damned, if a father is what he needed, a father is what he would have.
Perhaps it is what a 'real' mother would have done.
Dunno.
What was forged between us was this wonderful 'sameness'. It still amazes me that a child that only knew five summers with me would be so much like me. He introduced me to fantasy and we spent every Sunday evening talking about the latest book he'd introduced me to.
Game of Thrones is a series of books that we read. Along with Jordan, Feist and others. Next Sunday HBO has created a series for Game of Thrones. I tried to make alink.http://youtu.be/5PxLidxnAE8
So it is a "click here' kind of link, but I am excited to share this with you and again with my aged (30 year old) son. We have a bond that surpasses time... and though I did not raise him... it takes one look to know that I"m his mum. Genetics what a crazy thing. I'm glad he came home to me. Thrice. Once when his father kicked him out. Once when he returned from the military and once when he just came home. I am a blessed woman.
I drew "Things that Excite me"
This does.
My oldest boy, a hundred years ago, needed his daddy and I let him go. I won't even begin to try and defend what an "actual' mother would have done. I have done my time in "mother's hell" and I'd make the same decision. I could not give my child what he needed and social mores be damned, if a father is what he needed, a father is what he would have.
Perhaps it is what a 'real' mother would have done.
Dunno.
What was forged between us was this wonderful 'sameness'. It still amazes me that a child that only knew five summers with me would be so much like me. He introduced me to fantasy and we spent every Sunday evening talking about the latest book he'd introduced me to.
Game of Thrones is a series of books that we read. Along with Jordan, Feist and others. Next Sunday HBO has created a series for Game of Thrones. I tried to make alink.http://youtu.be/5PxLidxnAE8
So it is a "click here' kind of link, but I am excited to share this with you and again with my aged (30 year old) son. We have a bond that surpasses time... and though I did not raise him... it takes one look to know that I"m his mum. Genetics what a crazy thing. I'm glad he came home to me. Thrice. Once when his father kicked him out. Once when he returned from the military and once when he just came home. I am a blessed woman.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
My Bad
I was so sad earlier this week, I wanted for family and anguished that my family (the sibling family) was left wanting. I say you speak the devils name and it appears.
My sister called me. The following is an e-mail I sent trying to make sense of what happened.
ahahaha And to think I was actually wishing my family had been close knit.... dear gods there is a REASON we are not. That girl is a loon. It started off all nice and she was telling me the great deeds of her children and so I shared my children's wonderfulness. It was all good and laughy, some dude is trying to get her to go to the mormons singles event and she just didn't know, I was being playful and told her she really should..We talked for a long time and it was fun Then she said she thinks she might finally get the settlement on her shoulder and wanted me to tell her it was okay to buy a $20,000.00 mortorcycle...as it was Papa's last wish that she should have one and this one is built so that it wouldn't hurt her shoulder ...
Silly me I asked do you have a 401K? Savings? Anything set aside for a rainy day?
No, no, no
Then you would be foolish to spend that kind of money on a toy.
I do believe that was the turning point. It was all kind of down hill from there and I got sucked in. She does it by being the light happy sister everyone would want, and this week I was wanting that. Then she turns and it all just goes to hell. Because I let myself get emotionally invested I felt the need to defend myself. ahahahaha it is easier when she is just a bitch. I don't feel the need to try and make things right.
"Fool me twice and I'm done wich yur ass" *gotta get the hand gestures and ghetto slang going here, maybe even cock my hat to one side. ;)))
This is the second time this tactic has worked for her. I think I got sucked in 'cause the last time we talked it was good and she started out with good. I wanted good.
She accused my brother and me of giving her perigoric (sp) daily. No we didn't. Isn't that for... (I was going to say tummy troubles but she started screaming) BRAIN DAMAGE. IT CAUSES BRAIN DAMAGE. That's what the doctor's told me. If I'm a problem for you it is because YOU caused it.
Yeah, but I didn't do it.
She just kept it up and would not stop. She just kept throwing crazy notion after crazy notion at me and I kept saying "Sis, it didn't happen that way." She told me I went to USU for 4 years. Um, no I didn't. Just a bunch of crazy lies that had nothing to do with anything. At least in my mind.
There would be times when I'd correct her and she'd scream, " MOM TOLD ME THAT!!"
I said, then mom lied.
She kept putting words in my mouth and I would have to say, "That's not what I said Sis"
This went on and on.. every word a fabrication of the truth.
I kept pointing out that perhaps she should take the money from her shoulder and either invest in the internet and find a way to heal herself or to hire a therapist as she was having major issues that obviously needed to be addressed.
This is how it ended:
"I don't know why I called you. You always beat me up. Perhaps it is good for me, but you always beat me up. I call so you can beat me up."
I said, "Wow Sis, I didn't think I was beating you up. I was telling you what I honestly feel. You always tell me how much you appreciate my honesty. You tell me that you call me because you value my outlook on the world and you know that I will honestly tell you what I think and not hide behind social filters, just to be nice. But if you are calling me because you feel bad about yourself and feel the need to be "beat up". Then that is sick and I won't do it any more."
She wails, "Oh no, no, no...."
I said, "Nope! Hence for and forever more I will not play into your sickness."
She hung up.
I'm not sad.
My sister called me. The following is an e-mail I sent trying to make sense of what happened.
ahahaha And to think I was actually wishing my family had been close knit.... dear gods there is a REASON we are not. That girl is a loon. It started off all nice and she was telling me the great deeds of her children and so I shared my children's wonderfulness. It was all good and laughy, some dude is trying to get her to go to the mormons singles event and she just didn't know, I was being playful and told her she really should..We talked for a long time and it was fun Then she said she thinks she might finally get the settlement on her shoulder and wanted me to tell her it was okay to buy a $20,000.00 mortorcycle...as it was Papa's last wish that she should have one and this one is built so that it wouldn't hurt her shoulder ...
Silly me I asked do you have a 401K? Savings? Anything set aside for a rainy day?
No, no, no
Then you would be foolish to spend that kind of money on a toy.
I do believe that was the turning point. It was all kind of down hill from there and I got sucked in. She does it by being the light happy sister everyone would want, and this week I was wanting that. Then she turns and it all just goes to hell. Because I let myself get emotionally invested I felt the need to defend myself. ahahahaha it is easier when she is just a bitch. I don't feel the need to try and make things right.
"Fool me twice and I'm done wich yur ass" *gotta get the hand gestures and ghetto slang going here, maybe even cock my hat to one side. ;)))
This is the second time this tactic has worked for her. I think I got sucked in 'cause the last time we talked it was good and she started out with good. I wanted good.
She accused my brother and me of giving her perigoric (sp) daily. No we didn't. Isn't that for... (I was going to say tummy troubles but she started screaming) BRAIN DAMAGE. IT CAUSES BRAIN DAMAGE. That's what the doctor's told me. If I'm a problem for you it is because YOU caused it.
Yeah, but I didn't do it.
She just kept it up and would not stop. She just kept throwing crazy notion after crazy notion at me and I kept saying "Sis, it didn't happen that way." She told me I went to USU for 4 years. Um, no I didn't. Just a bunch of crazy lies that had nothing to do with anything. At least in my mind.
There would be times when I'd correct her and she'd scream, " MOM TOLD ME THAT!!"
I said, then mom lied.
She kept putting words in my mouth and I would have to say, "That's not what I said Sis"
This went on and on.. every word a fabrication of the truth.
I kept pointing out that perhaps she should take the money from her shoulder and either invest in the internet and find a way to heal herself or to hire a therapist as she was having major issues that obviously needed to be addressed.
This is how it ended:
"I don't know why I called you. You always beat me up. Perhaps it is good for me, but you always beat me up. I call so you can beat me up."
I said, "Wow Sis, I didn't think I was beating you up. I was telling you what I honestly feel. You always tell me how much you appreciate my honesty. You tell me that you call me because you value my outlook on the world and you know that I will honestly tell you what I think and not hide behind social filters, just to be nice. But if you are calling me because you feel bad about yourself and feel the need to be "beat up". Then that is sick and I won't do it any more."
She wails, "Oh no, no, no...."
I said, "Nope! Hence for and forever more I will not play into your sickness."
She hung up.
I'm not sad.
Friday, April 8, 2011
What a beautiful morning!
It is still snowing in Utah. Ugh. I am not a fan of the snow. I can say and often do, "I hate snow!" However, this morning it was Christmas card pretty. Chester and I walk every morning as soon as I wake and he convinces me I want to get out of bed. I am a morning person, so generally between 3:00 and 4:00 we are out wandering around in the dark.
The snow was a very wet snow and the gutters were full. We wandered over to the park and to Chester's suprise and delight the bog was a rushing river. He was so happy to splash about and explore the newness. I could hear ducks, somewhere in the bog. Generally the ducks and geese are over on the river, but a couple must have come exploring and decided to stay for the night. I convinced Chester that the quacking sound he REALLY, REALLY wanted to explore, was a fearsome beast who was best left alone.
It was a magical morning.
The snow was a very wet snow and the gutters were full. We wandered over to the park and to Chester's suprise and delight the bog was a rushing river. He was so happy to splash about and explore the newness. I could hear ducks, somewhere in the bog. Generally the ducks and geese are over on the river, but a couple must have come exploring and decided to stay for the night. I convinced Chester that the quacking sound he REALLY, REALLY wanted to explore, was a fearsome beast who was best left alone.
It was a magical morning.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
The obituary...
Erin G. Kunz 1971 ~ 2011 Our loving husband, father and son Erin Gary Kunz passed away on March 31, 2011 from heart failure. He was born December 26, 1971 in Murray, Utah to George and Karen Murphy Kunz. He married Ellie Mae Michaels on October 10, 1995. Erin was a self taught musician, he played the guitar and piano. He loved hunting, fishing and camping. He is survived by his wife Ellie, children Savannah and Christian Kunz, parents George and Karen Kunz, brothers Scott (Nina) Kunz and Billy Kunz, sisters Annalee (Curtis) White, Shauna Blea, Marge (Paul) Svedas and Marcie Kunz. A celebration of his life will be held on Wednesday from 1-3 p.m.***
I don't believe he was a mormon but I have to say that they steped up and really did a great job for the family. (Money was an issue) They gave them a place to 'celebrate his life' and they did it in style. Awesome folk.
The best comment of the night was from Grandpa George... he kept actually remembering people... didn't you work on my electricity? You should stop by. Didn't you do this? You need to come see me. To one fellow he said, "You haven't been around for a while. You KNOW the coffee pot is always full." He looks around at his surroundings and says... "That's the only thing that's missing..."
(Mormon's don't drink coffee ;)
It was awesome.!!
I love Grandpa George.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Not sure what I'm thinking exactly...
I attended Erin's funeral today, my 'son-out-law's' uncle What do you call the person who would be an 'in-law' but my children skipped the paperwork?
Many things hit me and would I could have felt right about pulling out my note book and writing down what I heard.
"Didn't recognize him. Cleans up good." Spoken by someone at our table.
Grandpa George, "Talked to him for 30 minutes. We both had the same memories. I guess I should know who he is."
Later: "I talked to him for an hour, suppose I should know who he is."
Mrs. Grandpa George says, "That was...."
Grandpa George, "Your brother? I KNEW I should know who he was."
These are just a few of the things.
There was sadness and tears, but there was rejoicing also...
"He's the last one in the family to shoot a deer. Glad that it was him."
(The deer hunt is a big deal)
"He's the best cook."
"Did you hear him play the guitar?"
Random conversations mixed with the young ones trying to figure out what a tie was, knowing it was important and proud to be wearing it.
It was a wonderful experience. What I'm happy for right now...my daughter has the wonderful opportunity to call these people family.
Can't say that with my family. Not sure what went wrong, but we are broken. I've accepted that we are 'broken' as a part of 'life'. I never realized what was lost until today.
It was a funeral in more ways than one.
I think I'm sad.
Many things hit me and would I could have felt right about pulling out my note book and writing down what I heard.
"Didn't recognize him. Cleans up good." Spoken by someone at our table.
Grandpa George, "Talked to him for 30 minutes. We both had the same memories. I guess I should know who he is."
Later: "I talked to him for an hour, suppose I should know who he is."
Mrs. Grandpa George says, "That was...."
Grandpa George, "Your brother? I KNEW I should know who he was."
These are just a few of the things.
There was sadness and tears, but there was rejoicing also...
"He's the last one in the family to shoot a deer. Glad that it was him."
(The deer hunt is a big deal)
"He's the best cook."
"Did you hear him play the guitar?"
Random conversations mixed with the young ones trying to figure out what a tie was, knowing it was important and proud to be wearing it.
It was a wonderful experience. What I'm happy for right now...my daughter has the wonderful opportunity to call these people family.
Can't say that with my family. Not sure what went wrong, but we are broken. I've accepted that we are 'broken' as a part of 'life'. I never realized what was lost until today.
It was a funeral in more ways than one.
I think I'm sad.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Who taped me exercising?..
Ahahah this looks like my daughter and myself every morning.
Guess which one is me? = )
Monday, April 4, 2011
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