Family Cancer Update

My sister in law (Chrissy's) PT scan revealed that her cancer has taken an agressive turn and chemo is no longer an option.  She will go into a hospice next week and had from three to six months.

My big brother (Scotty) has four to six weeks. The cancer in his lungs has made it hard to breathe even on oxigen.  The cancer in his brain is playing havoc with his motor skills.  They are giving him four to six weeks.  He too will be going into hospice care this next week.

His kids says that he is in high spirits and not from the morphine.



  

2nd Anniversary

We went up to Snowbird for our anniversary.  It was very nice.

Doug is a photog and so the pictures turn out awesome.  This is the inside of the hotel.

 This is the outside of the hotel.  Even IF I could have fit in my swim suit I would not have been as brave as some of the people.  There is still freaking snow on the ground.  In fact it was snowing as we drove up yesterday, flaking really, but snow is snow.  Since I didn't have to drive in it I could enjoy the beauty of it.



 Here is my anniversary present to him.  "Fine.  We can have our picture taken, but if I have more than seven chins NO ONE will ever see it."  Only one chin, so a deal is a deal, happy anniversary love.

ahahah True Confessions

In times of need: Nanowrimo, Chocolate Boot Camp.... there are times when I am not sure where a story should go.  I pull a stone.  I like the Runes and they have been my friends for many years.


Tonight as I finished a scene and while pleased with the word count knew I needed more if I were to scratch, claw, drag myself into third place.

I started a new scene but had nothing to write about.  I drew a stone.  Radio reverse.
"That's the last stone I drew," I said and threw it back in and drew again.
Radio upright?  The stones seemed to be mocking me.  It's Radio, take it how you will...

I laughed and I am going to ponder for a bit.  But then I'm going to write, so ya'll all bewares.

Chester Update

My tail wagging analysis was correct.  Our puppy's blood count is back to where it is supposed to be.  He'll have to stay on drugs for four months, but that's not bad.

Loves my Chester!!

Thompson Square - Glass

I heard this song on the radio and thought -- WoW   So I shared.

And the words:

"Tryin' to live and love
With a heart that can't be broken
Is like tryin' to see the light
With eyes that can't be opened

Yeah, we both carry baggage
We picked up on our way
So if you love me, do it gently
And I will do the same

We may shine, we may shatter
We may be pickin' up the pieces here on after
We are fragile, we are human
We are shaped by the light we let through us
But we break fast 'cause we are glass
'Cause we are glass

I'll let you look inside me
Through the stains and through the cracks
And in the darkness of this moment
You see the good in that

But try not to judge me
'Cause we've walked down different paths
But it brought us here together
So I won't take that back

We may shine, we may shatter
We may be pickin' up the pieces here on after
We are fragile, we are human
We are shaped by the light we let through us
But we break fast 'cause we are glass

We might be oil in water
This could be a big mistake
We might burn like gasoline and fire
It's a chance we'll have to take

We may shine, we may shatter
We may be pickin' up the pieces here on after
We are fragile, we are human
And we are shaped by the light we let through us
But we break fast 'cause we are glass
We are glass

It pays to be a wha baby!!

I am glad that I complained.  In Chocolate Boot Camp, the goal is to write words that move your story along.  I took it to mean that literally.  If I wrote a scene and then thought, that would never happen that way, I would cut the scene and start again.  That's why I was being a wha baby the other day.  I lost 1,000 words to a stupid scene.

Well I come to find out that all words count and the slashing is for the editing phase.
YaY!!  However, I might get demerits for whining because in Chocolate Boot Camp there is:

No whining and no excuses for low word counts in boot camp.

So I'll do my push ups, (girly style) and take my punishment if I must. But I'm glad I whined.

Chester Update

"One pill.  Two treats," I say.
Chester looks at me and if he could roll his eyes he would.  He knows I split the treat in half.  But he loves me anyway.

Chester went back to the Vet's on Monday and the pills appear to be working.  They had to do blood work to tell me this. 

Today I'm relying on the tail meter.  Chester is such a happy pup that he has to be feeling totally awful before his tail droops.  On Sunday it was a droopy tail.  Today it is all happy wags.  He had his jaunty walk back for his morning walk and even convinced me to go just a bit longer.

Well, Freaking that...

I've found myself in a bit of a sticky wicket.

I am used to Nano, all words count, even the insane ones at 2:00 in the am, that upon rereading you are asking yourself, "huh?"

When all words count, all words do.  When all words count if they progress the story forward, there can be questions.  Damn those vile questions!!!

How do you delineate the working words for those that don't?

Fine!!  Write, suck, write, suck... ponder, suck some more.  Word count is not as easy as it is in Nano. Just say'n.  1,025 for today.  I've had worse days.

I just need to suck it up and write more than I cut.  Or put the damn editor to bed and just write.  Not the silly 2:00 am stuff where you are just putting words to paper. But keep the phrasing even if it sounds odd.  Or keep the scene even if after writing it I say, "Well Teylor would never do that.  What was I thinking?"

Happy Mom's Day, all y'all

My kids spoiled me, they always do.  Gods love 'em.

Coffee and coffee stuff, hand lotions, an award, a bra... oh yeah, and a pedicure from my sDaughter.  I am a spoiled woman and I love it.

The sad news is that Chester has relapsed... maybe it is the Frankenstein days or something other, but his life is in peril.  But he still has his tail held high, and a romp and a gleeful lick of my hand, so I am keeping a hopeful heart.

This is so me and DH

The night of the Supermoon, while we were waiting for the event, Doug was saying that's Saturn, and there's someone else, and whosie faceit is over there.  I saw stars.

Awe... I am loved. Gotta love it!

What woman does not love getting flowers?
What woman does not love getting flowers you can eat?
What if they are even healthy for you?

The trifecta of, "oh my gawd I am loved."

Jess and Stavo sent me these today with a note:  Remember to smile = )

Trust me I was beaming.

One of the office workers asked who they were from.
"My kids," I proclaim happily.

You should say, "From a secret admirer." 

I didn't burst his bubble.  But I'd much rather have something from a loved one, so I just smiled and let him draw his own conclusions.

No soccer game tonight.  I was just leaving when Adam called to say it was canceled.  Boo, Hiss.

Beautiful moon

It was a bright moon for certain sure.  As to it being larger?  I couldn't really tell.
But it was enjoyable watching it rise over the mountains. With a glass of wine, a plate of cheese and DH for company...very enjoyable. 

This moon this morning.

More home movies.

I shot some video.  It was awesome, but Blogger seems to not want to upload.  It was during practice prior to the game and Evie kicked a goal and then the whole scene turned into something out of Benny Hill, I could even hear Yackety Sax playing in my brain. 

She takes the ball and puts it on a kids head.  He then flees the scene flailing his arms.  The game is a foot and Evie gives chase.  Big brother who has been known to join the game, during a real game comes running to chase after his little brother as well.  It all ended when everyone had passed little brother, who then managed to do a face plant.  He was fine and practice continued.

Okay - Blogger is just being a booger this morning.  I can't even preview my blog. I'm just going to publish (if it will do that) and hope for the best.

Supermoon

Party in the sky tonight.

A Supermoon occurs when the moon is making its closet approach to Earth and turning full.  A supermoon looms in the sky appearing brighter and larger than a typical full moon. 

From what I've read this moon will appear up to 30 percent brighter and 14 percent bigger than a regular full moon.  (here's a link to local moonrise times).

I'm sad.  Stupid really, but what cha gonna do.

It has been a rough week.  The news of my brother, like duh.  But also a co-worker who is very dear to me.  She calls me sMom and I call her sDaughter.  She went out a riding on a razor, a 4 wheel thing a ma bob and flipped that bad boy.  

She and the gal she was with survived.  That's a good thing, but they are not without their bumps and burises.  It just seems like it has been one thing after another this week. 

I'll suck it up but I think my word count for today will be zero.  I'm sad and think I'll go read a book aka kindle ; )

Happy Star Wars Day

And May the forth be with you....

Hey - I did Pi day, did you expect less?



On a more chocolatety note

Will Write for Chocolate started yesterday. 
My first impulse was to throw in the towel and not bother the others with my presence.  I wanted to curl up and just let the world wash over me while I hid.

Not a luxury.  My G-kid had a soccer game and I promised I'd go. 
Something funny happened.  I stopped feeling sorry for myself.  Cheering for the red team to go, go, go and thrilling when she came running straight for me at a break.  She wanted my water, grabbed it and contentedly threw herself into her father's lap to rest, but hey, for a moment I was all important. ;)

While I am sad. I realize that life goes on.  My brother would be the first to box my ears for finding the fetal position and hibernating.

Thank you to everyone for your well wishes and FGV's for Scotty. I believe that it puts the positive out there for Scotty and it helps me  pull myself up out of myself and keep moving forward, one step at a time.

Word count yesterday:  398
Word count today:  1034
Total:  1432

eh, one day of Nano but these are words that move the story forward, not just willy, nilly words! Just say'n.

Did not see that one coming...

My brother went in for his 5 year post cancer check up.  Each check up before this one had been good.  He asked the doctor if he got the high five for the five?
Nope.
Cancer is back and it's pissed off.  Four nodes in his lungs became 100 in two weeks.  He has a tumor the size of lemmon AND last week the cancer spread to his brain.  There is nothing to be done for it.

He called me today to let me know he had two months, maybe more.  They have him on some trial medicine and so I will try to stay hopefull.

The really crazy thing is my sister-in-law got cancer six or seven years ago.  At one point in the early diagnosis they gave her three months and she's still fighting it. 

Any feel good vibes you can send my brother Scotty would be very apprciated.