My Bad

I was so sad earlier this week, I wanted for family and anguished that my family (the sibling family) was left wanting.  I say you speak the devils name and it appears.

My sister called me.  The following is an e-mail I sent trying to make sense of what happened.


ahahaha And to think I was actually wishing my family had been close knit.... dear gods there is a REASON we are not.  That girl is a loon. It started off all nice and she was telling me the great deeds of her children and so I shared my children's wonderfulness. It was all good and laughy, some dude is trying to get her to go to the mormons singles event and she just didn't know, I was being playful and told her she really should..We talked for a long time and it was fun  Then she said she thinks she might finally get the settlement on her shoulder and wanted me to tell her it was okay to buy a $20,000.00 mortorcycle...as it was Papa's last wish that she should have one and this one is built so that it wouldn't hurt her shoulder ...
Silly me I asked do you have a 401K? Savings? Anything set aside for a rainy day?
No, no, no
Then you would be foolish to spend that kind of  money on a toy.

I do believe that was the turning point. It was all kind of down hill from there and I got sucked in. She does it by being the light happy sister everyone would want, and this week I was wanting that. Then she turns and it all just goes to hell. Because I let myself get emotionally invested I felt the need to defend myself.  ahahahaha it is easier when she is just a bitch.  I don't feel the need to try and make things right. 
"Fool me twice and I'm done wich yur ass" *gotta get the hand gestures and ghetto slang going here, maybe even cock my hat to one side. ;))) 
This is the second time this tactic has worked for her.  I think I got sucked in 'cause the last time we talked it was good and she started out with good.  I wanted good.

She accused my brother and me of giving her perigoric (sp) daily.  No we didn't.  Isn't that for... (I was going to say tummy troubles but she started screaming)  BRAIN DAMAGE.  IT CAUSES BRAIN DAMAGE. That's what the doctor's told me.  If I'm a problem for you it is because YOU caused it.
Yeah, but I didn't do it.

She just kept it up and would not stop.  She just kept throwing crazy notion after crazy notion at me and I kept saying "Sis, it didn't happen that way."  She told me I went to USU for 4 years. Um, no I didn't. Just a bunch of crazy lies that had nothing to do with anything. At least in my mind.

There would be times when I'd correct her and she'd scream, " MOM TOLD ME THAT!!" 
I said, then mom lied.
She kept putting words in my mouth and I would have to say, "That's not what I said Sis" 
This went on and on.. every word a fabrication of the truth.

I kept pointing out that perhaps she should take the money from her shoulder and either invest in the internet and find a way to heal herself or to hire a therapist as she was having major issues that obviously needed to be addressed.

This is how it ended:
"I don't know why I called you. You always beat me up. Perhaps it is good for me, but you always beat me up. I call so you can beat me up."
I said, "Wow Sis, I didn't think I was beating you up.  I was telling you what I honestly feel. You always tell me how much you appreciate my honesty.  You tell me that you call me because you value my outlook on the world and you know that I will honestly tell you what I think and not hide behind social filters, just to be nice.  But if you are calling me because you feel bad about yourself and feel the need to be "beat up".  Then that is sick and I won't do it any more."
She wails, "Oh no, no, no...."
I said, "Nope! Hence for and forever more I will not play into your sickness."

She hung up.

I'm not sad.