One of my co-workers is reading a book called Stop Walking on Eggshells. It's about learning to live with someone who has borderline personality disorder. In the front of the book it has a little quiz, "This book might be right for you if..." It then goes on to list a bunch of scenarios. As my co-worker read down the list I was thinking, Wow, this smacks of the relationship I have with Cybil and Cybil was right there saying, "YES! YES! YES!" Cybil then goes on to say, "Oh the two I LOVED the best were...." Oddly these two traits that she considered the BEST were ones that described herself.
I, of course, couldn't say anything at the time but after lunch I went into the gal with the book and said, "Are you afraid to voice your opinion for fear of an irrational outburst?"
I pondered picking up the book as I am a definite eggshell walker with Cybil but one of the things in the little quiz that came up over and over was the tone that this was someone you cared about, someone you wanted in your life and needed to find a way to make it work without being the one that is always giving and giving in.
Might be worth the ten bucks, but I don't really care about Cybil. I've made my peace with the time I've already wasted on her and don't need to waste anymore.
There would be good coping strategies in that book no doubt that could be useful if you find yourself locked in a room with someone like that again though....it's always worth the time to prepare yourself.
ReplyDeleteThere's someone like that in my life, too. Unfortunately she is trying desperately to hang on to my nephew. She already has a kid with him (his stupidity as much as hers, I know). Well, maybe it's his kid. There's some doubt and he won't insist on a paternity test or do any of the things he could to protect his family from her deranged personality. He could also be great help to the kid but as he doesn't establish his rights, she uses the kid.
ReplyDeleteI have limited tolerance even if she does have a personality disorder.
Delores: Part of me thought about reading the book so that I would have a 'bad of tricks' in case of future need.
ReplyDeleteJudy: Yikes!! I'm sorry. I truly understand the limited tolerance. I don't think that a personality disorder is an excuse for poor behavior. I hope that things work out to everyones satisfaction.
No fun. I'm glad you've recognized a bad situation and cut yourself from it as much as possible.
ReplyDeleteOn a lighter note, Happy Birthday!! You are going to LOVE Scrivener. I do. Also, I love your attitude towards birthdays. I enjoy them, too. Glad yours was wonderful.
= )
ReplyDelete